Yep, I lost my running mojo.

As you may already know, I hurt my right ankle while I was in Nassau. At just 2 weeks out from Rock ‘N’ Roll Dallas Half Marathon, I was limping for 3 days and didn’t run for 5. When I did get back on the treadmill, I took it easy (by easy I mean over 10 minute mile pace) and it still didn’t feel right, so I decided to take the last 5 days off before race day. I’m glad I did, but that means I only ran 3 days in the 14 days before the race. I’ve been running for so long and had never been injured like this before, I didn’t realize how it would impact me. Let’s just say the struggle started when the race started.

I’ll take it back to Saturday’s race expo day. The Dallas Running Club (DRC) had a booth set up at the expo. The DRC is a group of runners who run and workout together, but on race day, they help people meet their goals. My goal was to run 13.1 miles in 1:40 (1 hour 40 minutes). At the rate of my training before the injury, it was totally doable! After my ankle injury? A little aggressive, but still possible. The DRC informed me there would be someone holding a “1:40” sign the entire race and that if I followed them, I’d reach my goal. Easy, right?!

My race day alarm was set for 6:00 am and I slept until 6:40. I did my best not to panic, but I panicked! No matter what sport or hobby you do, you probably have some sort of ritual you follow to ensure a good performance. I had NO time for rituals. Everything before the race felt so rushed, but I made it to my corral on time and that’s all that mattered.

I found the 1:40 sign and I followed closely. The pace was much faster than I’m used to and I could never catch my breath or inhale deeply. I was very uncomfortable, but I managed to stay right by the sign for the first 6 miles. At mile 6 there was one of those loopy highway ramps that was extremely steep and I allowed there to be some distance from the 1:40 sign. The hard part was over and I tried to catch up, but shortly after the ramp there was another brutal hill. The 1:40 sign was even further away at this point and I knew there was no catching up. I was literally watching my dream run away from me and disappear into the distance. It was so hard to watch! Alas, after feeling sorry for myself throughout miles 6 through 9, I picked up my pace a little and did my very best for the last part of the run.

Even though I did this exact race one year ago (my very first half marathon ever), the course felt unfamiliar to me and I was just frustrated. My music was wasn’t loud enough. My Spotify playlist that I love wasn’t cutting it. The humidity was annoying. It’s exhausting being a negative Nancy, ya’ll. No wonder I’m so positive all the time!

Finally, I crossed the finish line and completed the distance in 1:43:40!!! It wasn’t the 1:40 I wanted, but I did beat my personal record and I guess that’s all I could’ve asked for. I didn’t have anyone waiting at the finish line this time around, so I took some time to collect myself. The weather was a beautiful 65 degrees and perfect for reflecting on the chaotic morning I’d just had. I regret being so frustrated and hard on myself throughout the race. Even with all the unexpected days off I had, I am SO proud of myself for just crossing the finish line! There are much bigger problems in the world and more pressing issues in my life, that my time on a race shouldn’t have bothered me so much and it’s something I’ll keep in mind the next time I start feeling down.

Though it was a rough start to my first half marathon of the year, I’m happy to have ended on a positive note.  One half marathon down this year, two to go. As always, I’m looking forward to my next race day! Thanks for reading! 🙂

XO, Vivian

I crossed the half marathon finish line at Rock ‘N’ Roll San Antonio! My race day alarm woke me up at 5:40 am and I was up in a second. I’m already a light sleeper, but when I’m nervous or excited I wake up at the first sound of my alarm so easily. I struggle waking up at 7:20 for my 8:00 am class, but 5:40 am on race day? Piece of cake! I chilled my hydration flasks in ice and let them get cold as I ate my usual: honey nut cheerios, yogurt, banana, lots of water. Before I knew it, it was time for me to make my french braid and head out.

The Hilton I stayed at was basically 2 feet away from the start line so I walked to my corral number (4 out of 23!) and patiently waited for my wave to start. And then go time! I struggle finding a pace, so I decided to follow this woman. She was at least 60 years old and hauling a** as my brother would say. To my surprise, I kept up with her until I lost her around mile 3 (she probably knew I was following her!). I managed to hold the woman’s pace throughout the race, which was awesome! I felt physically strong, yet weak as I was overwhelmed with emotion. It is one of the most incredible things to see strangers, volunteers, families, just standing along side the course or outside their homes cheering you on. They probably only know a runner or two and are not there to cheer me on specifically, yet the crowds make me feel like a superstar!

It was so foggy when the race started and I could feel a drop here or there, but come mile 6, the rain fell so hard! Ya’ll, I was NOT prepared for this turn of events. The majority of my training is on a treadmill, so in my mind, rain was not even a possibility. I went with it (not that I had a choice) and I had so much fun running in the rain. The leaves were falling, I was in a beautiful park, and I was smiling so big, everything was perfect! My heart was so full that I couldn’t help but thank our creator for allowing me to present in that moment. Then, the moment was over and the rain stopped just as quickly as it started. I was kind of relieved since my contacts were starting to dry out, and that’s when I noticed my shoes and socks were drenched! There was not a dry spot on my body and all I could see on the road ahead of me were giant puddles of water. Somehow, I didn’t let it bother me and I kept on running the last 7 miles with heavy shoes (again, I didn’t have a choice).

The run went by SO fast, at least in comparison to all the time I spent thinking about it. Every few miles there was a mile marker saying we were at (for example) 9 miles. Well, I misunderstood those mile markers. To my understanding, the number of miles meant I was going to start mile 9, but it really meant I had already finished mile 9. I know what you’re thinking, “it’s only a mile, why does it matter?” Trust me, I agree with you! BUT, I saw mile marker 13 and I was prepared to start sprinting for the last mile but the race was over. I was so disappointed! It was so anticlimactic, and I felt so silly for misunderstanding the signs. The disappointment quickly turned into excitement as I realized I beat my personal record by 9 minutes!!! I ran 13.1 miles in 1:50 (1 hr 50 min) and I could not be more proud of myself. I LOVE running and I can’t wait for my next half marathon!

Thank you so much for reading and stopping by! I know today was a long one, but I appreciate you following along!

XO, Vivian

My week:  It’s been A week. I was off to a great start and then I got hit out of nowhere (literally!). A vehicle hit me on Tuesday and it hurt enough to give me whiplash. And if you’ve never had whiplash, let me tell you that it’s no joke. The original plan was to run everyday this week, but I decided not to run on an injured neck that afternoon. I woke up the next day and it hurt to turn my head left and right, and it was even more painful to tilt my head back like in hair washing motion. A few headaches, ibuprofen pills, and warm compresses later, I’m just about fully recovered! My mom said I won’t recover as quickly later in life, so just this once, I’m glad to be a twenty something!

The city: I’m so happy to be writing to ya’ll from San Antonio! I lived here for 2 1/2 years during undergrad before transferring universities. I’m sad to say I didn’t spend any time in the downtown area when lived here. However, I’m back and I’m happy to be getting to know this city even better on a beautiful 13.1 mile run!

Training: I have been extremely hard on myself the past couple of months. It’s natural to want to compare ourselves to a different time in our lives when we were “better” at something, but it’s not such a good idea. I kept thinking back to January (when I was training for my first half marathon) and couldn’t help but think that I put in significantly more time and effort back then than I did preparing for this race. It was causing stress and I couldn’t take the personal guilt of knowing that I didn’t try as hard this time in comparison to last time, so guess what I did… I counted every single training run from my first half marathon, and counted every single training run for this half marathon, and I couldn’t believe it!!! I’ve trained more this second time around compared to my first time and it was a total shocker! Graduate school has taken over my life for the past year, but I am so incredibly proud to have made myself a priority and pushed my studies aside to take care of my health and accomplish my personal goals.

Of course, no run is complete without a few jams. I’d been running with my iPod from middle school for years, but I finally decided to retire my iPod to use Spotify on my phone. I’ve put together almost 4 hours of some of my favorite songs that pump me up and remind me of good times. I hope you find something you like, or use the playlist during your runs! Happy Sunday Runday!